• Honesty is important.

 

During the initial contact, it is highly likely that the counsellor will ask you some questions. Some of them may be of a more sensitive nature. So again, it is highly important to be honest when answering these questions. This again is so that the counsellor can decide whether they are the best fit for you, or whether the method of counselling, for example, face to face/telephone/online counselling, may be the right method for you.

 

These questions are also asked as part of a duty of care towards you. The counsellor will endeavour to direct you to someone of a better fit, if they feel that they themselves, for whatever reason, are not the best match for you at this time.

 

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• Book your first session!

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After having spoken to a counsellor, perhaps take some time to think about it before booking a session immediately. Perhaps you have spoken to more than one, so think carefully about with whom to proceed with.

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However, if you feel happy with what you have seen, then go ahead and book your initial session!

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On the other hand, if you did not feel the connection this time, continue the search process. There are thousands of counsellors out there, so you will surely find one that matches your needs!

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• Practice patience.

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Now that you have started your counselling, perhaps you are feeling that things are not changing as fast as you had hoped.

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In response to that, I use the expression ‘Rome wasn’t built in a day’.

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One way of looking at this is that the issues we bring to counselling are usually long-term ones, so it is possible that it will talk a bit longer than you expected before you start feeling any real change within yourself. 

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Counselling as a whole is a gradual process and will require a level of patience from the client. So do not despair if you feel you are not seeing change within a few sessions.

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Trust and have patience in the process!

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• Not every counsellor will be your perfect fit.

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There have been instances, unfortunately, where the counselling experience was not a good experience for the client. Negative experiences can ultimately discourage the client from seeking counselling again, as they come away with the impression that all counselling and all counsellors are the same, and so ‘Counselling doesn’t work for me’.

 

This is very unfortunate as the former statement that all counsellors are the same is not true. Assuming that the counsellor they saw was a professional and practised ethically, it could be simply that the way they worked did not fit the needs of the client at that time. And this may not become apparent until the actual counselling sessions begin.

 

This can actually be considered another part of the counselling process, as it has highlighted to the client what does not work for them. I would like to think that after such an experience, the client would again start looking for another counsellor This time they would have the experience in regards to what kind of counselling would be helpful to them, after having experienced what kind of counselling was not helpful.

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All part of the learning and growth process!

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(I would also like to add that if a client ever felt a therapist acted unprofessionally or unethically, then they have the option of reporting them to the counsellor’s ethical body).